Have you ever noticed the difference in the ways men and women talk? As women, we like to explore, analyze, and discuss our conflicts, often nodding and completing each other's sentences and speaking in detail. But if you interrupt men while they're speaking or overload them with information, watch out!  They'll either tune you out or get irritated, or both.

This difference is a byproduct of our evolution. (It's that Mars/Venus thing, honestly!) As "gatherers," our prehistoric female ancestors survived by multitasking — tending to the children, stoking the fire, and developing social bonds with other women all at once. We thrived by being mentally complex. Don't we still do that today?  Men, meanwhile, were the "hunters," focused on a single goal — such as driving the bison into the ravine, killing it, and bringing it home. Thinking about anything else could have been a fatal distraction.

Our cave-dwelling days still resonate in how we communicate — and argue — today. So when you want to hash it out with your man, focus on the solutions. Instead of playing the blame game or delving into endless details, approach the conversation with a sense of what you want him to do. Communicate requests simply, like 'do the dishes', 'put the kids to bed', or 'touch me like this' in a way that's respectful, but direct. Also, be sure to say what's bothering you, instead of nagging or, worse, brooding and never saying anything. That is very important, to avoid the festering that turns into a full-scale eruption.

Show your man that you can talk to him in his language — and he just might surprise you by speaking back in yours!

(thank you Dr. Laura Berman!)