I n some circles, Jennifer Cisneros is known as the “mean and lean divorce lawyer machine” and this is fine, as far as she is concerned, as long as you also remember that she’s an attorney with a heart. “It’s very hard when I see my clients not doing what I’ve advised them to do. I have turned away cases when I feel that a divorce is inappropriate or would put people into a financial hardship.” If you were thinking this is no conventional attorney, you would be right. She is also one very determined lady.

Despite her current reputation, Jennifer did not always aspire to be a lawyer. In the 1980s, she worked as a trader in Chicago, a field that, not surprisingly, employed few women. After two children and a move to Connecticut, she decided to get an advanced degree, “something in the legal field,” to go with her interest in investment banking. So this unconventional mom started law school, commuting two hours each way every day. If that was not enough of a challenge, during her first year, she found out she was pregnant. Her determination was tested again when her husband, Jim, was relocated to Northern Virginia and she had to commute to Connecticut for two months in order to continue her schooling. After graduation, she tested out a couple of firms, but felt “there was no passion there for me.” She partnered with a family law attorney and, together, they started their own firm.

She knows that it has been worth it. “It’s all about making a difference, not only for my clients, but also for my kids,” she says. Jennifer is proud that her three boys—Will (13), Jack (9) and Charlie (7)—see her as a strong woman with her own interests and career. She is equally proud of her role as a mom and knows how fortunate she is in having the flexibility that comes with owning her own company. When not working, she spends time with her children, realizing that soon enough they will be doing their own thing. “I try to go on their field trips and I’m involved in various school committees and organizations,” Jennifer says. The children have the added advantage of a father who is very involved in their lives and shares both the burden and the joys.
Home to the Cisneros family is out in the country on five acres at the foot of the mountains. As much as possible, Jennifer and her husband try to spend an hour together after work, and use their drive home to de-stress from the day’s pressures.


Three kids each going in a different direction is a challenge that Jennifer shares with other working moms. She credits organization and a good support system for keeping the chaos manageable. To help with the organization, the family has devised a calendar, color-coded by child, that shows who does what and where and when. “We live and breathe by the calendar,” says Jennifer. At home, she counts on a wonderful nanny to get the boys to school in the morning, pick them up and stays with them until Jennifer and her husband return from work. “We found him (yes, HIM!) online,” Jennifer laughs. She credits her success at work to a good office manager who “keeps her organized.”

Does she mind being known as aggressive? “Not really,” says Jennifer. “I actually take it as a compliment.” But her job has changed the way she looks at her own life. “Sometimes after dealing with some of the hard issues within a broken family, all I want to do is come home and hug my kids. My heart bleeds for these clients and it’s really hard not to get emotionally involved. It does make me more determined to have strong relationships with my own children and affects how I parent them. It’s also very good for my marriage. I can’t discount this as a real advantage.”

NAME : Jennifer Dore Cisneros PROFESSION : Attorney/Partner AGE: 44

How do you define Modern Motherhood? To be everything you can and want to be. This is different for everyone and should not be defined singularly.

You are a highly successful career woman and a mom. Did you ever contemplate not working after having children? No. I knew that for me to be the best person I could be for my kids, I needed to work.

Did you ever regret your decision to continue working? Regret is not the word I would use. I sometimes feel bad that I am not there for my kids all the time and that they have to make sacrifices for my job.

What is your life motto? You cannot regret the things you have done - only the things you have not done.

What is your dream job? It doesn’t exist – one that would allow me to be in two places at one time.

How do you strike a balance in your personal and professional life? Honestly, it is not easy. I have the advantage of working for myself so I can leave in the middle of the day to go to a third grade play or a first grade assembly if I know about it in advance. Other times, I have to be in court and cannot attend events that I know the kids would like me to go to. That is when the maternal guilt occurs.

What has been the biggest challenge in your life? Feeling as though my kids and clients are both getting the best of me and no one is getting cheated.

What is your guilty pleasure? The Housewives series on Bravo. It is so titillating! Can women have it all? How? Women can have as much as they want. It just requires a lot of self-forgiveness because it is never going to be perfect.

How do you differ from you own mother? My mother was a single working mother. She was a modern mother herself. She got her PHD when I was in high school. I have the luxury of having a very supportive husband and we are able to give our kids much more time than my mother was able to give to me since she had no support network. I think it has made me very conscious of how the kids feel if one of us is not present at their events.

How many hours a day do you see your children? Three to four hours during the week days and the majority of the time on the weekend. My husband and I purposely avoid going out on the weekends as much as possible. If we do, it is usually with the kids. My oldest son is now thirteen so he would rather spend time with his friends than with me, but he knows I am always there for him.

How many hours do you work a week? I usually work about nine to ten hours during the day and then will often work more after the kids go to sleep.

How do you make time for you? Good question. Unfortunately, that is usually the first thing to go. I do try to get out with a girlfriend or two for a drink once or twice a month for a few hours. It is a nice way to recharge. I try to commit to taking yoga classes a few days a week, but lately it has been difficult.

What quality do you admire in other moms? Patience and organization. Both qualities that I have to work at. Favorite Metro DC hangout: The Wine Kitchen is my new fave if you call that a “hangout”. I also enjoy the bar at Lightfoot.

Favorite family outing/activity: I enjoy going to movies with the kids. I try to take one separately at least once a month to have some one-on-one time. We try to do Family Movie Night at least once a week, but, unfortunately, the boys are into the action and scifi movies and I get out voted. I don’t get to see chick flicks very often.

Favorite restaurant: Lightfoot.

Favorite clothing store/designer: I am not a shopper. I like anything that looks good on me and makes me look thinner. I tend to gravitate towards classical type clothing – in black.

What do you wear when you are off? Jeans and t-shirts. What is your funniest mom moment? When my youngest son, Charlie was in kindergarten, he started complaining about his nose after dinner. After some questioning we came to find out that at school that day they had been doing an art project with lima beans and he had stuck one up his nose and could not get it out. He had been too embarrassed to tell the teacher and so he left it there until it began to hurt 8 hours later because it had begun to expand due to the moisture. I tried to pull it out with tweezers but it had grown so much it would not budge. My husband ended up taking him to the emergency room to get it removed. The doctors put it in a cup for Charlie to take home. He took it to school the next day but needless to say, the Principal confiscated it and kept it in her office. I guess she didn’t want other kids to get the idea of putting a lima bean up their nose!!!