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So, I wake up on Monday AM, just not feeling my usual peppy self. I go through the day doing my normal thing. Go to sleep earlier than usual. Tuesday, about the same, but now I have a cough that feels like I’m cracking a rib or two. I’m doing the honey and lemon thing, I’m taking ibuprofen like I own stock in the company. Interestingly enough, I have no appetite. I HAVE NO APPETITE. “I might be on to something,” I think in my delirium.
Wednesday, I crawl to where my husband sits, begging him to take me to urgent care, because I’m pretty sure, I’m dying. In fact, I don’t really care one way or another and death would be preferable to this miserable way I feel. At the doc’s office they test me for the flu. OK, now I haven’t had the flu since my 21 year old was two. I get my flu shot yearly, I stay away from people who say they are sick. Nurse returns to the room and wakes me up (I fell asleep on the table). “Type A flu,” they announce (wait a minute, isn’t that the bird flu?). 
“Please, please,” I beg them. “Lie for me, I won’t be able to live this down in my household. I’m the only one who got the flu shot.” They smile at me like I’m delirious.
“I want my money back from the flu shot,” I demand. Now they’re laughing.
I’m not kidding.
They give me the Tamiflu pills that supposedly lessen the effects of the flu by a day or two. Great, something to look forward to, next week. I crawl into bed, feverish and on codeine for my cough. I don’t remember the afternoon at all.
I did not, however, eat. When I woke, despite the 102.8 fever, I feel hunger pangs. It’s been so long since I’ve really experienced hunger pangs, I’m thinking this might be a side effect of the flu. But, no, they’re hunger pangs, alright. I can’t get out of bed thought. They’ll have to wait.
Friends call wishing me well. Cristi Adkins, the nurse from Fatloss Forever sends me a recipe for boosting my immunity (Green Tea, 2-3 cloves of garlic three times a day, soup of onions, tomatoes and chicken (will have to substitute veggie broth, instead) with ginger and pepper).
I need a wife.
My husband comes home and says he’s taking himself and our son out to eat.
“What about me?” I ask.
“You want to eat?” he questions. Clearly the man has never had the bird flu. Now I want to hold him down with one knee and cough on him.
“What do you think?” I ask sarcastically. Does he not know, I need comfort food: grilled cheese, mac and cheese, mashed potatoes….. lots of butter on anything mmmmmmmmmm? Can you guess that this is not what I get? I got mushrooms, a salad and rice.
I don’t eat very much, because it’s just too much effort to move my mouth up and down.
Then I’m banished from the bed so that he wouldn’t get sick. Luckily, I didn’t care. I fall into a sleepless daze on the couch.
I wake up yesterday and I feel FANTASTIC! I mean, I feel like I might have a teeny little cold and now I’m wondering if their flu swab was accurate. Still not too much of an appetite. I’m OK with that.
I clean the house, wash the dishes, wash the clothes (I even run an errand—despite the doc’s warning not to be near humans until next Tuesday – shhhhh).
Husband allows me back into bed.
I wake up today. I don’t feel as bad as I did two days ago, but I don’t feel as good as yesterday. Still no appetite. I now force myself to eat.
Wait.
Just one moment.
Let me take this moment in……
I now FORCE myself to eat.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
I have a question. Why now? Now when I’m trying to change my lifestyle and eat better and exercise, have I been sicker than when I eat and do as I wish?
Let’s see if I can make something good out of this. I run to the scales. Almost 5 pounds.
Hey this flu thing can’t be all that bad. Now let’s see if I’ll have to force myself to eat again this evening.
Val
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LOSE WEIGHT W/ VAL 
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