I'm here- alive and well.:) After my few depressing, down in the dumps posts,I received a few e-mails checking on my well-being. Too sweet. Looking back, I probably sounded a little psycho- almost like I had a little Britney moment and shaved my head or something. The truth is, I loved my long, flowing locks. But my long, flowing locks, were sure to break in half if they spent a month in the pool this summer, so I figured I might as well have them chopped at a nice salon since Daddy Warbucks only agrees to four visits to my stylist a year.

Speaking of Big Daddy, he's M.I.A. for the month. Work calls, and so I'm single parenting... and let me just say- Much love and mad props to those of you that do this regularly. Pat yourself on the back because you deserve it. I will say that I have a fresh outlook this month. Just when your hubby drives you crazy, when he is called away, you realize how much you miss his pile of laundry that he can't pick up and move two measley feet to the hamper. You miss his cup hidden in a random cabinet because he doesn't like reusing new ones all day. You miss his shoes constantly being left out... and you might even miss a dutch oven or two... or maybe just that warm body that provides instant security like nothing else in this entire world. And before you know it... you miss him. Everything about him. Well, not everything. I'm loving my Charmin and forgoing the one-ply Scotts that he loves this month.:)

I need to bookmark this post. Sometimes I think I'm crazy for sharing all that I do here. Some of you might think I'm down and out reading this. I'm really not... but there's no faking or hiding it- I'm disgusted with my body.

Today was the day I was supposed to pick out a cute little frock to wear to a family wedding that is on a boat this weekend. I wanted something bright and fun. Instead, I went from store to store with money to blow... and came home with a pair of earrings. I didn't even buy shoes, because I swear even my piggies have gone up a size in footwear.

In any kind of weight loss, the dreaded plateau rears it's ugly head.  It does not matter what kind of exercise you are doing, it happens.  Our bodies are amazing machines, though.  I think this even more so after it has been the operation center, home, and feeding station for my baby!  Now, it is working overtime in getting weight off that I put on it.  Pure and simple, our bodies are one of the most interesting and strongest machines that are capable of so much.  I am literally in awe of how much it can endure.  It's so important to treat it with respect - so why is it that most of us don't?

I had huge plans. Even detailed. I was chatting with my friend at the gym and had concocted a plan to be waiting for the hubby when he returned from work late at night in a nightie, with music going, and candles lit. I might even have been freshly showered and shaved, too... but I wasn't sure if I should pull the big guns out. Afterall, I don't know if we've had candles lit since P.B. days... as in pre-baby time.

And then it happened. Aunt Flo came on with a vengence. Like a moth to a flame, she reared her ugly head... and it was downhill from there.

I love my life... but the one thing I struggle with (besides this whole diet and exercise thing) is contentment. It seems as though I'm constantly searching. If it's not one thing, it's another. I'm searching for a new sofa, free activities for the kids, a new park to try out, a new diet or quick fix that never pans out, a new hairstyle... I could go on forever. If I'm given twenty dollars I try to concoct a plan as to how to get fifty. If I polish my counters, I don't admire them, I just move onto doing the floor. I'm always thinking one step ahead and it drives me nuts.

On Sunday, we had a good morning. All four of us managed to shower and make it out the door to church on time- sometimes a small feat of it's own.:) I always feel like it's going to be a good week when I make it to a sermon. The kids learn about Jesus, my hubby and I squeeze hands during hymns and I feel that happy love, and I always leave inspired. Except for this Sunday.